Monthly Archives: December 2011

Annoying Conversation #29: “Video Game Math Is The New Reading” (Which Equals Another Hour of Video Games!)

For those of you keeping track at home, this is the second in a two-part series of “Annoying Math Conversations.” The first was “Shopping Math is The New Free.” The video is below but in a nutshell: shopping math means everything is free — if you count what you saved when you spent money on stuff as money you can later spend on more stuff. In other words, all the money you “save” by getting stuff “on sale” counts as “actual money” you can “spend” on “more stuff” later.

Which means: You basically earn money when you spend money, not lose money when you spend money.

Are you following?

This “creative accounting” principle of “using what you don’t really have because you already spent it” but “pretending you still have it and didn’t spend it” applies to “Video Game Math,” too. Here, my son — I mean, a boy — is explaining to my husband — I mean, his father — how the three hours he’s already spent playing video games doesn’t really count and that he’s actually earned MORE time for all the time he’s spent playing video games that didn’t count.

Are you following?

Annoying Conversation #26: “Shopping Math is The New Free!” (Which is Why We’re All Broke!)

“Creative Accounting” isn’t just for big banks and big business! Anyone can do it!

For regular people like us, it’s called Shopping Math. When you use Shopping Math, everything you buy on sale is basically free, which means you can buy more. Especially when you use Special Credit Cards (that accrue Points!) or Groupons (for stuff you don’t need and will never use!). In fact, sometimes you actually EARN money by SPENDING MONEY! It’s so cool!

And it’s why we’re all going broke!

ANNOYING CONVERSATION #25: “What Do You Want For Christmas?” (“By Which You Mean, ‘I Want a Divorce.'”)

Marriage + The Holidays = This.

Only married people — or children of married people — can understand how a seemingly simple and harmless question like “What Do You Want For Christmas?” can turn into a bloodbath.